Pushing the Button

Current word count: 65,731 (In final revisions of my current manuscript.)
Song on my playlist: "Hey Ya" (The acoustic version by Obadiah Parker)
Drink of choice: A VERY large coffee. (Caramel Macchiato)

It's just after 8:00 AM, and I'm attempting to get my groove thang going this morning. It's been a bit of a trying week. Actually, that would be an understatement. Applying the "ass-to-chair" method has gone awry at some point, and now I find myself in a tizzy trying to catch up.

I'm a goal oriented person. If I don't set deadlines for myself, then, who will? The problem with that is I know, deep down in the crevices of my mind, that no one is going to breathe down my neck if I let a self-imposed date slipped passed me. I'm an "indie writer," after all. So, I have every option to go at my own pace and finish when I finish. However, the flip side to this is that it's oh so easy to allow the distractions of life to come in and steal away my time and attention.

That's exactly what's happened to me these past few weeks. Between work, family events, yada, yada, yada, I've let a set goal date for completion of my final revisions slip past me. It was at lightning speed. All I know is that I heard a "swoosh" and papers went flying, everywhere. (Metaphorically speaking, of course.)

So, here I sit... blogging. Makes sense, right?

Anyhoo, I'm just about finished. I do have a few final chapters that I have to tweak. Then, I will set my launch date and push the "publish" button. At which time, an inevitable freak out season will incur.

Maybe, that's my problem. Commitment issues. Committing to pushing the button. Maybe I'm afraid of the rejection factor and what people will think about my writing. Of course, I don't expect to please everyone. You can NEVER please everyone. You can have 1,000,000,000,000,000 great reviews. But, oh that ONE! That one that stings so badly, you need an EpiPen to save yourself from Anaphylaxis shock. Yeah... that ONE, sucky, horrible, nasty review.

I think that writers, although we love what we do and are passionate about our craft, have this innate sense of foreboding that can paralyze us with over analyzing our work and bitch slap our creative muse. Even when we are writing what we love, we have to keep in mind our readership. We want to deliver on our promises. We want to earn the right to be read. After all, even after all of our sacrifice of time and mental energy used to complete our "masterpiece," it's the reader who is sacrificing their money to purchase our work, and then, their time to read it. I don't ever want to take that for granted.

I guess I said all that to say, I'm nervous. As I draw this work to a close, I'm hoping that my novel will deliver. My desire is that readers will connect with my characters and fall in love with them, as I have. That my readership will be moved with compassion, laugh, and cry. And, that on some level, they will relate to these beautiful people that have been birthed from deep within my soul.

So, I will push that button.

XOXO,

C.J.

P.S. I will be scheduling a virtual launch party for SOD via Facebook. I hope that you will join me. I will be posting the particulars, soon. If you are an author, and would like to join my party, I would love to post links to your work as well. And, as always, if you've enjoyed this post, please let me know! It's always awesome to hear from others.