It should never be zero degrees!

Okay... I'm a true native Southerner now living in the Northeast. This morning, I woke up to ZERO degrees! I'm freezing my southern bumm off! (Well, maybe that won't be such a bad thing, after all.) The fire is going, and the heaters are on. My coffee is steaming. But, I still feel a chill. Ughhhh! It should NEVER be zero degrees!

Just had to vent... thanks for letting me.

Anyhoo, I wanted to say sorry that it's been a few days since my last post. Things have been a little bit hectic. As I'm sure it is with most of us. I'm currently revising my manuscript that I dug out of the drawer after two years in hiding. It's been really cool to see it with fresh eyes and new ideas. If it was good then, I hope it will be great now. We'll see.

Then, I have my current WIP which is very exciting for me. I think it may be my fave yet.

The hardest thing for me, until recently, has been to find focus. But now, I feel as though I'm falling into place and the pieces of my life are organizing themselves in spite of myself. Does that make sense?

I'm feeling more confident, and ordered in my writing.

I love what H.G. Wells once said, "I write as straight as I can, just as I walk as straight as I can, because that is the best way to get there." Brilliant!

Maybe that's where I am right now. I'm learning to be lean and straight forward without all the fluff and stuff. I'm not so impressed with myself anymore, or my flowery language. I'm honest. Which in turn, will keep my characters honest and believable. And my descriptive voice, easy and exciting to listen to. I hope so, anyway.

"Good writers are those who keep the language efficient. That is to say, keep it accurate, keep it clear." - Ezra Pound

I agree. It's the "doing it" that has been such a challenge.

I hope all is well with you friends! Hope you stay warm and inspired.

XOXO CJ

Shoe Mood:












BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!

Growing Pains

The other evening, my youngest daughter and I sat on the couch and watched "You've Got Mail" for the 35,000th time, and still enjoyed every moment of it. My daughter likes it because she loves books and thinks that I'm a lot like "Kathleen Kelly." I love it because of the story line, three of my fave actors being in it, and of course the setting in NYC.

Even after the 35,000th viewing, we still cried at the same place that we do every single time. We simply call it, "the twirl" scene. You see, we used to twirl and dance like I'm sure many of you mothers and your daughters did together. We've picked larkspurs and Queen Ann's Lace, taken walks, have run through fields of wild flowers, rolled down hills, tickled, giggled, and just plain laughed together. We still do. But something about watching "the twirl" scene had a deeper emotional impact on my girl this time. She cried deeply. When I finished my weeping episode and asked her if she were okay, she said, "No... I'm growing up too fast."

I never realized that we both had been crying about the same thing. I cried because I remember so fondly my little dancer, and I could never imagine my life without her. She cried because she remembers being my little "boo bear" who was my always constant companion when she was younger. "I'm just growing up and getting big too fast, Momma. I'm going to miss this (snuggle time) when I grow all the way up. Sometimes, I wish I were little again."

"I know, sweetie, I know," I said. "I'm right there with you. But I have to say that I love who you are growing up to be, and I wouldn't exchange that for anything in the world."

We dried our tears, kissed each other and sat back to watch the rest, knowing that we'd cry again when we heard Brinkley bark and Joe Fox come walking around the corner calling his dog's name. Then, "Don't cry shop girl..." And, we did.

XOXO CJ

Shoe Mood:












Home relaxing because of a "Snow Day." YAY!

Believe in yourself and in your own voice...

I hope these first few days of 2009 have brought with it a renewed sense of self for my wonderful friends who have longed to find their voice or determination to see certain writing challenges through for this next year. I feel like a new person, myself. That may sound like a bit of a cliche', but, it's true non-the-less. I mentioned some of these changes in my "life" blog, but for those of you who visit me here, this is what has happened within me as I ushered in the new and said "ta-ta" to the old.

It has become my choice to be in love with life. To change my outlook on things that have recently annoyed, irritated, and just plain stole my precious creative flow (whether it be in writing, painting, our simply planning my pre-k lessons). Things are not always going to be perfect, or even remotely nice. But, as long as we choose our battles and not allow ourselves to be sucked dry by the “fleas on the dog of life,” we should be fine.

I’ve seen friends lose much this past year, and have watched as they’ve coped. It has made me all the more thankful for what I’ve been entrusted with. I’ve learned more about what is truly important.

I’ve been very introspective lately as I've contemplated the new year. I hate to say that I’ve made resolutions. Most likely because the ones I’ve made in the past were rarely kept. I think because they’ve been more of a superficial type of nature, like promising myself I’m going to exercise everyday, or drink more water, or buy fewer shoes (just kidding), or... you get my point? This year it has been more of an in depth kinda thing. From the inside out versus the outside in. Maybe it came with age. I don’t know. I just know that it came. I’m more resolute, dedicated, and determined than ever in certain areas of my life and future endeavors.

And, what will come of all this? Enjoying life and how beautiful it is. That is my hope, anyway. Laughing when things are funny, appreciating the beauty in the small things, and crying if only absolutely necessary. Not worrying about things that are out of my control (which is just about everything), and continuing to smile at everyone. When hugging, really holding that person, and when telling “girlie” things to friends, snicker like a school-girl. Savoring my kids, and their precious moments that flit by like a vapor and become a distant memory all too soon. Re-investing myself in my family and friends. People is what life is all about.

On the writing front, I want to reach deeper than ever before and pull out myself from my toes. I want to soak up the wisdom of others and grow in patience and endurance. I truly want to meticulously hone my craft. I want to honestly believe in my voice, while remaining teachable and pliable.

Jayne Ann Krentz said, "Believe in yourself and in your own voice, because there will be times in this business when you will be the only one who does."

It takes a lot of "stick-to-it-tiveness" when writers are faced with loads of rejection. But, stick-to-it we must. If we do, this could be the best year yet.

I sure do love and appreciate you all! You have kept me going when I’ve wanted to give up. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Thank you for joining me on my journey.

XOXO CJ

Shoe Mood:











I'm walking on sunshine! Whoa!

Be not the slave of your own past...

I think that I mentioned something about reflection earlier in one of my posts. That's where I've been lately... in a place of introspection and self-awaking with regard to my writing endeavors. Now, I'm certainly not trying to sound too deep. I'm simply stating what's happening in me. Now, this has happened before, to a degree. But, never with such resolve as I've seemed to muster this time around. I'm determined to go beyond my past.

On of my favorite quotes comes from Ralph Waldo Emerson. I even have it framed and on my bookshelf in my writing area. (Mary Engelbreit painted a great pic to go with the quote.) He said, "Be not the slave of your own past - plunge into the sublime seas, dive deep, and swim far, so you shall come back with self-respect, with new power, with an advanced experience, that shall explain and overlook the old."

That, my friends, is where I am today. As I contemplate 2009, and what I wish to accomplish, I meditate on this wisdom. Now, I cannot guarantee my self to be a published success. What I can guarantee, or shall I say what power I hold, is that of resolution and dedication to the craft. If I give it my best, my true and honest best of self, I can insure that whatever happens, I can be assured that my time will come.

I hope this serves as inspiration and encouragement for those of you struggling to find your voice or your identity as a writer. Always remember... writers write!

XOXO CJ

Shoe Mood:









Getting back to business!

Now, this is just a little something that I do on my website. Everyone seemed to love knowing what "shoe mood" I was in from day to day. So, I thought I'd do it here. It's just a little fun way that I like to express myself. ;-)

I'm Feeling "Scrappy" Today...

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas this year. We sure did in my house. It was a very reflective one as well as relaxing. There was something quite pensive and peaceful about it all. Very different from years past. Not that they haven't been nice, it's just that I think I'm in a different "place" this year. Things took on a deeper meaning for me and my family. Aside from the wii, guitar hero, and the ipod touch, that my girls were surprised with, they too, took on a different and more meaningful attitude towards this holiday, in-spite of the exciting gifts they received.

I'm excited to have this next week off from school and ministry. I've needed a break for some time now. Best of all, I'm fully recovered from that stupid viral funk that hit my tummy-tum. WOW! That threw me for a few loops. The "Jingle Jam" that I directed went on after a snow delay, and was wonderful! The kids did a fabulous job! Now, I lay and wait for New Years, contemplating my next year and what I want to make of it. What about you?

Well, sweet writer friend and fellow cyber-lit-chick Nora, nominated me for the "Honest Scrap Award." What an honor, seriously! It's nice to know that people see me for who I am...I hope.

As taken from Nora's explanation of the process:

"Scrap means left over, fragments, discarded material. Many times truth and honesty are discarded material, considered fragments and left over. People like us need to tell it like it is, and let the scraps fall where they will. There are 2 guidelines for receiving this award. One, you are to list 10 honest things about yourself. Make them interesting, even if you have to dig deep. Two, present the award to 7 other bloggers."

Okay, here it goes...

1. I'm 41 years young. Now, I know that that might not seem like one of the honest things to list, but, hey... how many times have we've been told that women should never admit their age? Well, I'm admitting it, and am proud to do so! I'm not ahsamed to be aging. I'm finally at a place of real contentment, courage, and confidence.
2. I tend to take on too much, making me a, "Jack of all trades and master of none." Then I get terribly frustrated with everything and everyone.
3. For someone with such a type A personality, my desk it a total mess. And there are times when I'm really busy that my house looks like it threw up on itself. (Particularly my laundry room and writing area.)
4. I've walked away from writing on three separate occasions. Just gave up on myself. But, I've recently found a renewed sense of self in my identity as a writer, and believe that the third time will be a charm.
5. I didn't meet my biological father until I was 25. I still struggle at times with it all. We are no longer in communication after a few years of trying to make it work. Sometimes, parents can be so selfish.
6. I never realized how selfish I was until I became a parent.
7. I'm a shoe whore.
8. I have no patience for perpetual stupidity. I try... really, I do. But, I've not been able to stomach it. (Especially, when I'm the one being stupid.)
9. I still miss my Grandfather so much it hurts. Especially when I want his input on my writing.
10. I think I will always wonder if I've been the best wife and mother that I could have been.

There they are. 10 honest things about myself. Now, I must nominate 7 others. Let's see... Kelly Pollack, Danette, Angela, Becca, I'll be back shortly with the others.

XOXO CJ

Oh, how I love Christmas...

The brisk winds and crisp chill of the air. The honking of geese as they fly south for the winter. The faint ringing of church bells in the distance on a dark still night. The crunch of snow beneath my feet as I trudge along the whitened path. The array of colored lights reflecting their beauty off of the ice like multicolored semi-precious stones. The laughter of children as they are wound with the energy of the holidays. Christmas carols, foil-wrapped presents, and the desire to do good deeds. Holiday plays, manger scenes, and star-topped trees. Good wishes, merry spirits, and feeling the depth of love. Being loved. Celebrating a special birthday. Oh, how I love Christmas.

Sheeeeee's Baaaaaack!

Hey Y'all! Got back from warm Florida a week ago and have been running and screaming like a banshee ever since.

Had a fabulous time with our families. Visited St. Augustine (one of my all-time fave places to be), savored Thanksgiving at a relaxed pace (almost forgot what the word "relax" meant), and enjoyed just taking a breath. Especially at the beach. I miss the ocean living here up north and more than two hours away. I was a spoiled Native-Floridian, never more than 30 minutes away from the fresh salty-air and beautiful white-noise of the ocean waves for most of my life. Heaven on earth is what the beach is to me. Simply delightful. But, now I'm back and returning to normalcy.

Anyhoo, needless to say, I DIDN'T make the NANO deadline. But, I will say this, although I fear the judgment of cliche', I have a beautiful beginning of an awesome manuscript with a totally fab hook. (In my humble opinion, of course.) So, I'm honestly pleased, and on my own deadline for completion of my first draft by the end of January.

I should have known that I was taking on too much by signing on to do it. But, It did force me to press in and find the next story that I was looking for. How 'bout you?

Also, I wanted to take this time to encourage you to buy books this holiday season. Some publishing houses are experiencing lay-offs and restructuring, so... BUY BOOKS! Support your fave authors, publishers, and book stores. Imagine a life in limited print. No wonderful smell of dusty pages turned by fingertips dampened by the tongue. Okay, I know it sounds dramatic, but could you imagine if publishing houses were few, and we had to rely on e-books and comp. screens to read new releases? Uggggh. No thanks! I'll save the screen for blogging and surfing. I prefer books for the reading.

XOXO CJ