I'm Feeling "Scrappy" Today...

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas this year. We sure did in my house. It was a very reflective one as well as relaxing. There was something quite pensive and peaceful about it all. Very different from years past. Not that they haven't been nice, it's just that I think I'm in a different "place" this year. Things took on a deeper meaning for me and my family. Aside from the wii, guitar hero, and the ipod touch, that my girls were surprised with, they too, took on a different and more meaningful attitude towards this holiday, in-spite of the exciting gifts they received.

I'm excited to have this next week off from school and ministry. I've needed a break for some time now. Best of all, I'm fully recovered from that stupid viral funk that hit my tummy-tum. WOW! That threw me for a few loops. The "Jingle Jam" that I directed went on after a snow delay, and was wonderful! The kids did a fabulous job! Now, I lay and wait for New Years, contemplating my next year and what I want to make of it. What about you?

Well, sweet writer friend and fellow cyber-lit-chick Nora, nominated me for the "Honest Scrap Award." What an honor, seriously! It's nice to know that people see me for who I am...I hope.

As taken from Nora's explanation of the process:

"Scrap means left over, fragments, discarded material. Many times truth and honesty are discarded material, considered fragments and left over. People like us need to tell it like it is, and let the scraps fall where they will. There are 2 guidelines for receiving this award. One, you are to list 10 honest things about yourself. Make them interesting, even if you have to dig deep. Two, present the award to 7 other bloggers."

Okay, here it goes...

1. I'm 41 years young. Now, I know that that might not seem like one of the honest things to list, but, hey... how many times have we've been told that women should never admit their age? Well, I'm admitting it, and am proud to do so! I'm not ahsamed to be aging. I'm finally at a place of real contentment, courage, and confidence.
2. I tend to take on too much, making me a, "Jack of all trades and master of none." Then I get terribly frustrated with everything and everyone.
3. For someone with such a type A personality, my desk it a total mess. And there are times when I'm really busy that my house looks like it threw up on itself. (Particularly my laundry room and writing area.)
4. I've walked away from writing on three separate occasions. Just gave up on myself. But, I've recently found a renewed sense of self in my identity as a writer, and believe that the third time will be a charm.
5. I didn't meet my biological father until I was 25. I still struggle at times with it all. We are no longer in communication after a few years of trying to make it work. Sometimes, parents can be so selfish.
6. I never realized how selfish I was until I became a parent.
7. I'm a shoe whore.
8. I have no patience for perpetual stupidity. I try... really, I do. But, I've not been able to stomach it. (Especially, when I'm the one being stupid.)
9. I still miss my Grandfather so much it hurts. Especially when I want his input on my writing.
10. I think I will always wonder if I've been the best wife and mother that I could have been.

There they are. 10 honest things about myself. Now, I must nominate 7 others. Let's see... Kelly Pollack, Danette, Angela, Becca, I'll be back shortly with the others.

XOXO CJ

Oh, how I love Christmas...

The brisk winds and crisp chill of the air. The honking of geese as they fly south for the winter. The faint ringing of church bells in the distance on a dark still night. The crunch of snow beneath my feet as I trudge along the whitened path. The array of colored lights reflecting their beauty off of the ice like multicolored semi-precious stones. The laughter of children as they are wound with the energy of the holidays. Christmas carols, foil-wrapped presents, and the desire to do good deeds. Holiday plays, manger scenes, and star-topped trees. Good wishes, merry spirits, and feeling the depth of love. Being loved. Celebrating a special birthday. Oh, how I love Christmas.

Sheeeeee's Baaaaaack!

Hey Y'all! Got back from warm Florida a week ago and have been running and screaming like a banshee ever since.

Had a fabulous time with our families. Visited St. Augustine (one of my all-time fave places to be), savored Thanksgiving at a relaxed pace (almost forgot what the word "relax" meant), and enjoyed just taking a breath. Especially at the beach. I miss the ocean living here up north and more than two hours away. I was a spoiled Native-Floridian, never more than 30 minutes away from the fresh salty-air and beautiful white-noise of the ocean waves for most of my life. Heaven on earth is what the beach is to me. Simply delightful. But, now I'm back and returning to normalcy.

Anyhoo, needless to say, I DIDN'T make the NANO deadline. But, I will say this, although I fear the judgment of cliche', I have a beautiful beginning of an awesome manuscript with a totally fab hook. (In my humble opinion, of course.) So, I'm honestly pleased, and on my own deadline for completion of my first draft by the end of January.

I should have known that I was taking on too much by signing on to do it. But, It did force me to press in and find the next story that I was looking for. How 'bout you?

Also, I wanted to take this time to encourage you to buy books this holiday season. Some publishing houses are experiencing lay-offs and restructuring, so... BUY BOOKS! Support your fave authors, publishers, and book stores. Imagine a life in limited print. No wonderful smell of dusty pages turned by fingertips dampened by the tongue. Okay, I know it sounds dramatic, but could you imagine if publishing houses were few, and we had to rely on e-books and comp. screens to read new releases? Uggggh. No thanks! I'll save the screen for blogging and surfing. I prefer books for the reading.

XOXO CJ

Okay... here's the deal.

I've missed y'all! Been REALLY busy with... well, life. I've fallen very behind in my NANO endeavor. However, I know where I'm going. So, I hope to be back on track real soon. (I've not updated my word count, UGHHHH! Need to do that, like now.)

I've had major computer issues as of late. It even made me cry for a few moments the other day. (Out of absolute frustration, I'm sure.) My laptop (where I type my NANO WIP) cord broke so now I can't charge my laptop. As I watched with horror as my battery level drained and melted away like Frosty the Snowman on a warm day, I hurriedly attempted to email myself my manuscript in order to open it up on my MAC. However, I didn't realize that my two word processing programs are not compatible. What does that mean? It means that I couldn't open my WIP on my MAC. "No comprende," Mr. Mac said. "No hablan Gateway."

Anyhoo, I now have a partial on my laptop until I can run out and buy the $105.00 cord that I need to recharge my battery (that won't be until Thursday). And, the remainder of my WIP is on my MAC. Divide and conquer. I feel like that's about what has happened to me. That and I'm still dealing with a parent at school who feels like I'm contributing to pagan rituals by having allowed the children in our preschool to paint tiny miniature pumpkins during the week of Halloween. We've still not come to an agreement. And, I don't think we will on that score. But, that's a whole other story.

However, I will say, "Push on!" That's what I'm going to do. In spite of my hectic schedule, crazy people, a house that looks like it threw up on itself, a dog who has (well, not technically on himself, but on my oriental rug in the dining room that I now get to go and clean), and all the little fleas on the dog of life that would love nothing more than to suck the blood right out of my creativity and drive. We can do this, people... whether or not you're participating in NANO, you do have a WIP that you're working on, right? Push forward. Forge ahead. Completion or bust!

Well, I have parent teacher conferences beginning tomorrow. So, I'm needing to go now, and complete the remaining student assessments (after I clean the puke stain out of my rug).

XOXO CJ

Happy Birthday to Me!

Yes, today is my birthday. I won't tell you how old I am, but I will say that I'm one year shy of being 21 twice. Anyhoo, I'm really excited about this birthday, because it's special in a big way. Why? Because I kept a promise to myself and attended my first writer's meet-up. That was my present to myself. Putting a fire under my bumm and participating in my writer's group.

I've been a member for 9 months now. But, I've yet to get to any meetings. That is, until today. I'm so happy with myself. It was just another small victory in my determination to re-identify myself as a writer.

There's something to say about getting to know other writers, whether they write in the same genre or not. We all have many of the same challenges, disappointments, and what-not. It's important to understand that we are not alone in this journey.

It may not seem like a "big-deal" to others. But, to me, it was. When you break enough promises that you've made to yourself, you find that you just quit making them altogether. That's where I was. I just gave up because I had lost my resolute attitude. So, when I quit making excuses, and signed up for NANO, and RSVP'd for my meet-up, and told my family that I was getting back up, brushing myself off, and going for it again, this time with all the self discipline and resolve that I could muster, I realized that I was not only making a promise to self, but to others. A sense of accountability rose within me. I would not only be disappointing myself, but I would be breaking promises to others who believe in me.

I am a writer. Writers write. It's as simple as that. Happy Birthday to me!

XOXO CJ

Ready... Set... WRITE!

Okay, for those of us who are participating in NANO, today was the big day. I hope that you were able to start off with a "BANG!" I'm sitting at 1008 words so far. I'm not finished for the day, just taking a little break. I wanted to update the word ticker on the NANO site, but I can't seem to sign in. I guess there's been an influx and the server can't handle it right now.

I'm really excited about this current WIP. I have a problem though. What is it? My "inner-editor" is creeping up. I feel her. She's standing over me with her librarian spectacles, waiting and watching for grammatical errors and what-not. She and my muse are at each other's throats today. My muse loves artistic abandon. She enjoys the free-spirited writing that I had promised to give her. However, "Lady Editor" came for an unexpected visit and is determined to make me abide by the rules of proper literary etiquette. I'm hopeful that this can be a peaceful venture. The jury is still out.

How about you? Do you find that you stop yourself in the midst of a flow and correct things that honestly, could stay put until a later revision? This is my first time attempting NANO. I really thought I could just sit and write without my perfectionistic ways dominating my creative process. I'm truly a both sides of the brain type of gal. I'm 49% left and 51% right, or is it vice-versa? Does it really matter? I'm basically 50/50. And I find that my artistic side and logical side often go to war over creative control. I guess I just have to have a talk with "Lady-Editor" and let her know that I'll call her when I need her services. Until then, I'm going to have to simply "court the muse" if I'm ever going to get through this thing called NANO.

XOXO CJ

Word count update: 2238

I'll Snag the Tag!

Okay, sweet cyber friend, Kelly Polark, put out the challenge for anyone who would like to snag it. What is the catch? Tell seven little known things about yourself. So, here it goes...

1. I was a cheerleading coach.
2. I was a child model and made commercials.
3. I use to pull the tails off of lizards so that I could watch them wiggle without a body. (Okay, I was only four!)
4. I still like to catch lizards when visiting family in Florida. (I don't pull their tails off anymore.)
5. I also like catching green garden snakes.
6. I love to play practical jokes.
7. I didn't meet my biological father until I was 25.

Anyone else game? Just leave a comment letting us know so that we can pop by and visit ya! Thanks, Kelly!

Okay... tomorrow is the BIG day. Those of us who are participating in NANO are gearing up for the great 50K word challenge that starts tomorrow and runs through midnight on November 30th. Good luck to us all!

XOXO CJ